A best man speech they'll still quote next year
The roast, the stories, the moment it lands, built from what you actually know about him.
Why this speech is hard, and how we make it easy
The best man speech is the one everyone looks forward to, which is exactly why it's terrifying to write. The good news: you already have the material. Twenty years of stories, one bad stag do, and a friendship worth talking about. We turn that into a speech that gets laughs without crossing the line, and lands one moment that actually moves people before the toast.
- 01Open by introducing yourself and how you know the groom, one line, then straight into it.
- 02Thank the previous speakers and compliment the wedding party briefly.
- 03Light roast of the groom: two or three story-driven jokes, affectionate rather than cruel.
- 04Pivot to sincerity: what his partner brings out in him, and why they work as a couple.
- 05Close with a short, confident toast to the bride and groom.
This is the exact structure your speech is written to, filled with your stories, in your tone.
Your speech, three steps away
Answer the questions
About ten minutes, and it costs nothing: who you are, who it is about, your best stories, and the tone you want. No writing skill needed, just the truth.
Read how it opens
Your speech gets written from those answers straight away. You land on a private page showing the real opening, not a sample and not somebody else's.
Unlock the rest
If it sounds like you, pay and the whole thing appears, plus two more complete drafts with a different feel and two free tweaks.
Three ways to get it written
Back in minutes
Everything I know about wedding speeches, built into the brief the AI writes from.
- Answer about ten minutes of questions, free
- See your real opening before you decide anything
- Unlock it for three complete drafts, each with a different feel
- Two free tweaks if a draft is not quite right
- A private link and email delivery, yours to keep
Back within 48 hours
The AI writes the draft, then I go through it line by line before you ever see it.
- Written by AI from your own stories, and I say so
- I read it out loud, so you know it works said and not just read
- I cut anything that will land badly in that particular room
- Names, dates and details checked against what you told me
- One round of changes once you have read it
Back within a week
A proper conversation, then a speech written from scratch. No AI at any stage of this one.
- A call first, about 45 minutes, where I get the stories out of you
- I write the whole thing myself, with no AI at any point
- Drafts back and forth until you are happy standing up with it
- Notes on delivery: where to pause, what to cut if the day overruns
- One person, named, accountable for your speech
Best Man speech questions
How rude can a best man speech be?
How long should a best man speech be?
What if my stories aren't that funny?
What if there are two of us? Two best men?
Guides for the best man speech
- What order do wedding speeches go in
The traditional UK order is father of the bride, groom, best man. Why it runs that way, where the bride and maid of honour fit, and how to handle two best men.
7 min read
- How long should a best man speech be
Five minutes, around 650 words. The word count to minutes table, why laughter eats your running time, and what happens to a wedding room at minute eight.
8 min read
- A best man speech, beat by beat
The seven beats of a best man speech in order, with a word budget for each that adds to about 650, plus how to run the turn and split it between two best men.
8 min read
- Where the line is in a wedding speech
Two questions decide whether a best man joke lands or lands badly: who does it cost, and is the couple laughing or bracing. Danger zones and repairs.
8 min read
- A maid of honour speech when you are not the funny one
Warmth lands harder than comedy at a wedding. Four structures for a maid of honour speech that works without jokes, and how to follow a best man who got laughs.
8 min read
- Wedding speech nerves, and the ten minutes before
Wedding speech nerves are physical, and so are the fixes. What to do with your hands, why the second drink costs you, and a countdown for the last ten minutes.
8 min read